May 21st post #2 - diagnosis

Let the scans begin. Jet and I are people watching in the ER and both thinking “what a crazy place to work “. I’m told the initial head scan is not good so they want to do a second with contrast and while they are at it just scan the whole body. Great! My left hip has been hurting so can we get a look at that too? I mean I’m here. Let’s get it done. Scans are done and we meet a neurosurgeon, Dr Jin We immediately have “P” (more on this beautiful wicked smart angel later)researchingthis dude. He is top notch. He is calm, thorough and direct.

My first questions? Is it dementia? Did I have a stroke? No to both and I actually say to him “oh thank god. That’s good news. So other than the brain 🧠 scans everything else is clear. Ok, so that’s good news right? Well , not so much……

First and foremost there is a brain tumor. Generally if it is a metastatic tumor from another location the odds are more likely it’s NOT glioblastoma OH! New word! Jet and I immediately start to google it. I very clearly remember looking at her and saying “fuck……this is not good”. Talk of surgery to relieve the pressure and get a culture start. Time to take a deep breath. My 1st born, Adeline lives on the west coast. We face time, text and talk several times a day. I have always promised her to tell her everything that goes on here. she is just a few weeks away from receiving a masters degree in psychology and there is no one word to describe how freaking strong she is. I know it’s a decision she has to make about coming before the surgery which they schedule for Friday 5/10. Addie arrives Thursday night. My boys are of course by my side as well and although the circumstances suck having all 3 in the same room at once is and will always be my greatest joy but having them all so worried about me really really really sucks.

The dynamics of this beast invading my brain 🧠 “ heterogeneously appearing intra axial lesion centered in the posterior temporal lobe, right occipital lobe and the right occipital horn.

Pre op later today.

Love and sunshine ☀️ to all

Jeanette