The First Steps

Good morning to all

I thought I would begin a series of essays to keep everyone up on my current journey because shit is about to get crazy!

My babies and I are absolutely blown away by how many amazing people have asked what’s happening and I wish I could take the time to speak with you all individually but truth be told it’s all pretty overwhelming. I’ll do my best while my eyes are still semi-behaving to share with you all and hopefully along the way help others with all we are learning about terminal glioblastoma brain cancer. I am so blessed to be surrounded by friends and family that are doctors, lawyers, investigators, and researchers. I know not everyone is as fortunate so I would like to share what I’ve learned as knowledge is the best tool. Please feel free to post wherever you feel would be helpful to anyone.

🟡How this Bullshit started:

Well, the best way I can describe it is about 3 weeks ago I felt like my automatic pilot was “off”. You know how we all go through our busy daily routine and just get stuff done? To me it seemed like everything was an effort. You make excuses. Lots going on, preoccupied, getting ready for the new market season, money stress, blah blah blah. Ya just keep going. I felt tired (but aren’t we all?) and I had a minor headache (allergies !right ?). Just keep swimming, girl. You’re fine.

🟡Things that make you go “huh”:

Why does everything seem so different? Like the neighborhood? Or the local market? I wasn’t feeling lost. I knew where I was, I knew what I had to get done but it felt like what my eyes were seeing wasn’t completely computing to my brain properly. I drove right past my house on my way home one day. My thoughts? Oh sweet Jesus I have an early onset of dementia! I made an appointment to see my regular doctor and kept busy with my granola business. I also decided to not drive as I felt some indecision while driving that I couldn’t quite understand and I didn’t want to take any risks. On May 4th I saw my GP and she ordered some tests. Said to have them and follow up in 2 weeks. 2 days later, On Monday 5/6 while out with my son Robbie I lost my peripheral vision on the left to about midline… crazy how the brain works or in this case doesn’t! I immediately called my doctor and was told to go straight into the ER. Let’s make sure that you aren’t having a stroke. A stroke!?There is no time for this crap.

🟡Today’s chuckle:

My sister Jet is my sidekick, my granola packer and we are always together. At the ER the dr asked her if she noticed I was acting weird, clumsily, or banging into stuff. We both laughed. If you know me well enough you know I am a teddy bear in a china closet. I am constantly banging my toes on the furniture or bouncing off shit. “Graceful “ was never part of my playlist. So it was not an easy question to answer for either of us. More tomorrow on how the next few days went leading up to the 1st surgery. Oh fun fact: Putting your pants on backwards is a classic brain tumor symptom! My neurological team told me it’s one of the first things they learn! Seriously! WTF!

🟡Closing:

Finally, thank you for everything you have all done to embrace my family and I. I have always known just how blessed I am to have 3 of the most beautiful humans on this earth call me Mama and it gives me so much pride to share them with everyone through this. Please continue to share my journey.

Sending you all so much love and sunshine

Jeanette